A week ago, netizens were still raving about It’s Okay Not To Be Okay’s 17th episode, to the point that it trended although the series ended with 16 episodes in total. Perhaps, that in itself is a measure of how other than successful, IONTBO is a K-drama we would have loved to spend more time with – the show understood us, made us understand other people, and gave us a deeper look at the role of childhood and family through literary themes.
Not only in 2020 but even in the past two decades or more, K-dramas usually have a valuable lesson to them even if they’re hidden in teeny-bopper or action genres. But personally, I have never seen an approach to one of the most human and raw topics that is mental health, the way It’s Okay Not To Be Okay presented it. It was not a mere highlight in one or two episodes, it was the overarching message of the show.
The drama is already undeniably popular, so what made it impactful and perhaps one of the best K-dramas ever?
1.Proper representation of Autism through Sang-tae’s character and its impact on poor families like Gang-tae’s.
Once it was clarified that Sang-tae has Autism, I already knew I would have either a biased appreciation or extreme scrutiny of IONBTO’s portrayal of the disorder. I am a sister to a younger brother with Autism, and as a viewer, the last thing I wanted to see was either misrepresentation or making the talk about Autism non-existent and simply a mentioned part of Sang-tae’s character. However, it’s the complete opposite.
From the verbal challenges, a certain need for more special attention despite the adult age, and sensory overload because of a simple touch of his hair, Sang-tae represented it accurately through the writer. Despite having Autism, it’s a heartwarming ray of hope for people like me the way Sang-tae’s talent didn’t go to waste. For such a huge platform that K-drama is, I owe the creators of the show a thank you for leaving the message that Autism is not a disability that will hold people like Sang-tae in real life, but just another challenge they can overcome if they are surrounded with supportive and loving people.
2. It takes a village to raise a child, as the African proverb says – and it goes to the people in Gang-tae and Mun-yeong’s life .
Ju-ri’s eomma/mom is the different side of perhaps the most pivotal and general role in IONTBO: the parents. Mun-yeong didn’t get along well with her parents especially her mother, and Gang-tae had thought that his mother gave birth to him only to take care of Sang-tae and for a few episodes, we thought that was true. Soon-deok was a very caring mother not only to Ju-ri, but to Gang-tae, Sang-tae, and eventually Mun-yeong. While Gang-tae is working at the psychiatric hospital, he could entrust Sang-tae to Soon-deok and Jae-su. Without these people, it would have been difficult to do his tasks and earn for a living.
In the same thought, Gang-tae was able to help Mun-yeong with the added presence of Ju-ri’s family, even his best friend Jae-su, and he himself along with Sang-tae. On a more systematic and professional approach, everyone in the OK psychiatric hospital equally played an important role under this theme by taking care of their patients.
IONTBO showed us that in healing every child in us that has gone through trauma, it can’t be done alone. There has to be many people who can genuinely and patiently see us outgrow ourselves as biproducts of our painful past.
3. The message of mental health not being directly associated with social status, both the rich and the poor may have struggles with it’s life.
Perhaps throughout the drama, you asked yourself why Do Hui-jae would go through the lengths of becoming Park Haeng-ja to make everyone’s life difficult. She was a famous author with a loving husband, a beautiful daughter, and wealth, right? And although she was never formally diagnosed in the drama, she was clearly struggling to have killed Gang-tae and Sang-tae’s mother with no remorse. At worst, she was fixated on making Mun-yeong her carbon copy in every way possible. This theme was also present in minor characters such as the prominent and wealthy politician’s son who came off as a family black sheep despite his mental illness, the war veteran patient in the psychiatric hospital diagnosed with PTSD or post-traumatic stress disorder.
The drama painted the reality that even though you have everything, you may still face the difficulties of mental health. And that if money and fame solved everything, the castle and the status would be enough not only for Do Hui-jae and Mun-yeong as well.
4. Parents are not their children and vice versa, and they can take on a completely different road with or without them.may have struggles with it’s life.
Do Hui-jae thought of Mun-yeong as her artwork, and since she has become a failure in her eyes, she was ready to discard her own daughter. In fact, this situation is not exaggerated in real-life families, but it’s not a truth either that you can easily hear about. Many children are compelled to live up to astronomical expectations in both well-off and poor families. However, parents like Do Hui-jae have to remember that children are not objects of dependence, whether or not it means depending on them to be just like them in their successes, or be the ones who can start their delayed ambitions.
The drama painted the reality that even though you have everything, you may still face the difficulties of mental health. And that if money and fame solved everything, the castle and the status would be enough not only for Do Hui-jae and Mun-yeong as well.
5. Adults and environments carve memories vividly into children, the good and the bad – and children carry it with them as they grow up.
Remember Mun-yeong’s scene in front of her late father’s resting place? Although most of the earlier episodes have shown us her rough relationship with him, she was able to recollect one good memory of her father – he once read her a story book, and it was a happy memory. What IONTBO made us understand here is that children are pure, and even when they are already adults, they try their best to remember only the great times amidst a hundred of painful moments.
Gang-tae himself feels that he took on a responsibility hidden as a curse by being Sang-tae’s only guardian, and felt honest jealousy over receiving less attention from their mother compared to his brother. But the story ended with Gang-tae never giving up on his life-long task as his brother, until Sang-tae himself realized that he has his own dreams to independently make.
Have you already finished It’s Okay Not To Be Okay? Share with us your favorite realization from this K-drama on the comment section!
